High School Reunions

This is the tenth year I have been out of High School...Good ol' Malad High. In fact, high school is the only time I lived in Malad...I moved right after graduation and I didn't go back...except for the time I moved home waiting for winter semester to start at Rick's College. Now my parents have moved, my brothers no longer live there and the only ties I have are a handful of friends that remain there. My dilema? Do I really want to go? I know there are some people I really want to see. There are, honestly, some people I couldn't care less to see. And I am sure there are those who couldn't care less to see me. That is how itall works. There were 86 in my graduating class...I maybe have heard from five of them. Janet, my friend from High School lives in Twin...but even when we lived three blocks away we only saw each other a couple of times. I am sad about that. I think that is the bottom line...people change. I have changed. Not that I am better than anyone else, I am far from that, but it is well known that the only thing that is constant is infact change. I can assume that there are those members of my class who have changed as well. But I am sure there are those who have not. Those who have remained the same. I was speaking to Janet on the phone the other day when we found out about this reunion. We speculated over what it might be like. Do we take our kids? Are they invited? What will people think when they see that I personally have gained a TON of weight? Do we even care what others think? I think inside we would like to think we don't care, but I know that we do. So, I am torn...do I stay or do I go? If I go, I am going to visit a very special friend, Heather, while I am there. And, I am going to see if our very favorite photographer can take my boys' pictures. But, then I have another problem...there is not a hotel in Malad and I have no family to stay with. So, that means that I make the two hour drive there, and the two hour drive back in one day...meaning four hours in the car with my boys. If it wasn't confrence weekend, I would stay the night somewhere and visit the ol' ward. But, I am sure that has changed as well. TORN!!! I have three days to RSVP. I know Troy can't go...or I guess he could, but he doesn't want to. So, I will be solo with my kids. Humph. I would like some feed back on reunions. Those who have gone, could you maybe give me some insight. Those who didn't go, could you let me know if you regret not going? Thanks, I am stumped here and I would like to know what to do.

Shh, it's a suprise!

It is 11:30 p.m. and I just finished painting my front door a very pretty sage green and my bathroom trim a orange-rusty-peachy color. Troy was asleep when I returned from Home Depot, so he will have a suprise when he wakes up T 3 a.m. for work. Tomorrow is his birthday, so I wanted to suprise him. I just hope he likes it.
So, Troy turnes the big 3-0 tomorrow. We were supposed to go out to his parents' for cake and icecream, but who knows what we are doing now. He doesn't know if he wants to do that. So, Friday his mom and dad are taking him shooting...they shoot clay pigeons up on the dry farms. Then they are coming to IF for dinner. Troy picked Carino's, so that is where we will go. Maybe we will have cake and icecream then. ??? I just hope he has a suprisingly great birthday...ya know 3-0 can be pretty discouraging. Me? I am not that far behind him!!!
I have a post saved that I need to finish...one day I will actually get to it. It has pictures, too. :) I am really tired, but I cannot shut the front door yet. I am afraid the paint will stick to the weather stripping. So, I am sitting in my front room...which looks like an office...wishing I could hit the hay. Oh, BTW, I bought Troy a shed for his birthday. He and his dad worked on it today. I am very excited for it...maybe this winter we can park the car and the van in the garage!!! That will be nice. I have an awful mouse in that there garage. YUCK!! I saw it run by my foot a few days ago. It will be nice to have all the tools etc. in the shed so that we can keep the garage much tidier. So, I guess you could say that I was a bit selfish when I picked out the shed. But in my defense, he has wanted one for a few years and just won't spend the money. So I made the executive decision and bought him one. We are also getting one side of our vinyl fence in the next week. It will be so nice. I am excited aboout all the projects. There are still plenty more, but it is nice to get the little things out of the way.
I will get that other post finished. Maybe. For now, this is what is going to be posted. Good night to all of you still awake and sweet dreams to those sleeping.

PEACHES PEACHES PEACHES

It is 2:00 a.m. right now and I am waiting for my peaches to finish bathing. The original plan was to do them at 6 in the morning tomorrow, but I thought, "Hey, why not get a head start?" Unfortunately they are taking A LOT longer than I thought. I had to blanch, peel, cut, fill the jars, wipe the jars and then steam bath them. WHEW! But, I guessed pretty good on the peach count for the batch. I had a couple left over that I thoroughly enjoyed with some cottage cheese. YUMMY!!! So, in about 30 minutes I will be able to crawl...and I mean craw...into bed for about 4 hours of sleep. I tried to recruit some help with this plethora of peaches, but no takers. I have 3 bushel of peaches...some have already gone bad...to do and 115 pounds of pears. What was I thinking????? I think I was thinking that I want some yummy fruit this fall...and I think peaches and pears will be delicious! So, no pain no gain...Right? I actually I enjoy it. I get to stand over the sink peeling and thinking about life. I do a lot of my pondering while I can. We picked apples last night, so I get to do some more applesauce and apple pie filling this week too. It should be easy enough. Troy should be able to help with the kids so I can fly through them!!!
Tomorrow we get an additional driveway poured to accommodate our trucks for Troy's deliveries. We have hired our neighbor and he will run the Blackfoot-Shelley-West Idaho Falls route. I hope it works out. Troy went to Boise this last weekend to buy a new truck. He is excited that the business is expanding and I am excited he didn't try to do it all on his own. He is now also delivering Steve and Harry's coffee and soon Dutch Boy cookies. He has big plans and I am thankful he is so driven so I can be home with my babies. He is so good to us...he does everything he can to make us happy. What a guy!!
The kids are doing well. Tevan is still figuring out how to walk. He has it down...but he gets lazy and falls to his knees and crawls. He is trying so hard to be like Daeson. Daeson is trying so hard to get away from him :). Actually, they really get along most of the time and I can get some things done during the day.
Oh, and a BIG congrats to my sis-in-law, DaniDell, she and Todd are expecting a baby in April!! Hooray for them...I get two new nieces and/or nephews this spring. Come in Kayla...your turn!!!!!!! Just kidding! Congrats to Todd and Dani and Jesse and Carlie.

Defeated

It is 11:55 a.m. and I am already home from church...IT STARTED AT 11!!! I have been sitting in a classroom for a half an hour with two very unruly children. I am defeated. I actually left sacrament meeting in tears today. I guess it all started this morning when Tevan sliced his fingers open on my paper cutter blades...then to be told that I need to start keeping my crap put up high. As if I didn't already feel like crap. Then we were 10 minutes late to sacrament meeting becasue of it. The only seat was in the front row. YUP, right smack dab in the middle. If you have ever been in an LDS chapel, you know that voices travel and it doesn't take much to hear every thing. As soon as the deacons sat down, we left the chapel and the tears fell. I really hate it...going Sunday after Sunday by myself. I hate not having any help. Every Sunday I go and battle this unbeatable battle. I am beginning to wonder if I should just stop going all together, but I know I have a stronger testimony than that. What kind of mother can't even handle her own children for an hour in church? If ut was just a few Sundays I was defeated, I probably wouldn't feel this way...but Sunday after Sunday I leave church feeling 10 times worse than before I went. I know it is not supposed tp be that way, but for me it is. I am also tired of everyone blaming Troy for not going. It is his choice to go or not. I am not his mother and I will respect what he does. He is my husband, he is my children's father and I will not stand for judgement made against him. I love Troy, he is a GOOD!!! man. He would do anything I asked, but I also love him enough not to pressure him into going. I tried that for six and a half years and it almost broke us apart. Does it make me sad that we don't share that same eternal goal?? Yes. It does...very sad. It makes me almost heart broken. It makes me ache every time our three year old asks me why daddy isn't going. I can't answer because in all actuality I am not sure why. I am not even sure he knows why. Enough said on that. I need to get back to the church to get my stuff out of the chapel. This might just be the adversary pulling me down, and today HE won. Maybe next week I will win, who knows. All I know is that today I am defeated and I feel like a failure.

Give those to the cows...

Daeson is starting to put things together. Yesterday we went to the fair...Grandma Tom, Tevan, Daeson, Barbara, Austin and Cameron...and the kids were able to see the animals up close. We even got to see the goats being milked. The kids thought that was great and I didn't think anything of it until last night. I was getting in the shower and Daeson said, "Mom, Tevan doesn't drink milk from *those* anymore, so you need to take them off and give them to the cows." I thought this was the funniest thing, he has made one more comment about them. A few weeks ago, he said, " Mom, Tevan hungry and him want milk." I said, "Daeson, we just had breakfast." Daeson, "No Mommy, him want *those*, your milks." I said, "Mommy doesn't feed Tevan like that anymore." Daeson very quickly replied, "Then why you still have them!?" I guess this is the fine line that parents don't realize exists. I am going to have to be careful, he is picking up on EVERYTHING!!! He is so stinking smart...he can put anything together. THe other day we drove by a gas station, the one he usually has to pee at and proclaimed he had to go. Troy and I told him it was closed since we were a couple blocks from our house and we were not going to stop. He saiud, "Uh, uh, it not closed. Why is there a car there then Dad?" Explain that! I wasn't going to post this blog, but I thought it was sooo cute, and because I use this as my journal, I didn't want to miss out on this. It is so easy to forget! Have a happy Friday, I am off to set up the yard sale....YIPPEE???