Slowing down

I feel like things might finally slow down, although life in general seems to be so quickly passing.

The boys are in swimming lessons last week and this week. They love it. I love to watch them "swim" through the water. They are so excited with everything they learn.

Tevan repeatedly says, "I am so glad I am five." He loves to be five and feels so grown up. We still have issues with his eating habits, but he seems so much older lately. Daeson went to a friends house this afternoon and Tev said, "But if Daeson leaves I will be alone and that means I will be lonely." I told him he could hang out with me and he folded his arms across his chest and said, "Fine! I will just have to be lonely then!" Gosh, I didn't know I was so fun to hang out with! We ended up reading several stories and he liked it.

Daeson is sassy as ever and smart as a whip. He loves to play and has dying for me to let him have friends over. I decided I am not the cool neighborhood mom. I am the do-your-chores-first-and-then-we-will-see-if-you-can-play-mom. Usually it takes them a couple hours to clean their room so they miss out on a lot of play time. I am not sure how their room gets so messy...it's cleaned everyday!

Troy is done with his super-duper-harder-than-ever-Anatomy and Physiology class. He did great and we are all so happy it is over. He is in a theater class and a medical ethics class right now. They seem a breeze compared to last semester and the last summer class. He is working for his brother for a couple of months throwing ice...or stocking the ice coolers. Today was his first day. I think he will do great.

Kaebryn is growing like a weed and continues to eat EVERYTHING! She has been sick, once again. It started last week. She is now getting better and has a runny nose. She started this all about 8 days ago. Yuck! I feel super bad that our little neighbor boy and friend caught it. They were sharing germs through toys! Yucky. But she is doing much better. She is so close to walking and chatters about everything. She loves to cuddle! I love to cuddle her back!

Me? I have stayed plenty busy. I am not exactly sure what I have been doing, but I feel like I have done a lot this summer. I got most of my weeds pulled in the front yard...sunburning my back in the process. Troy said I look like I have a tramp stamp. It is flaming red and it is very sore. I weeded for two hours the other night and my jeans kept slipping down around my hips. I am paying for it every time I move! Tonight I got most of my plants in the garden. I will finish tomorrow morning. I started working out at the gym and I love it. I use a Cybex machine...a type of elliptical. I burned 463 calories in 20 minutes the other day. Love it! Thursday we took the kids to the Drive0In theater. We saw Madagascar 3 and Men in Black 3. They were good...or what I saw, Troy and Daeson were the only ones who made it through both movies. Saturday we went to the Relay for Life cancer walk. It was a lot of fun. Our booth was cupcake making. It didn't go as well as we thought, but it was fun to do. Troy had the kids while I ran the booth.

Saturday I had a yard sale in the morning and in the afternoon, we went to the zoo with the Grover cousins. It was a lot of fun and the kids had a blast. Ryker and Sadie, our SLC cousins, were here. They are so cute. Sunday I made cinnamon rolls and we delivered them. And, ate them! I should not have made a double batch! After getting back from Troy's parents, we had some of our friends over for s'mores. It was fun to roast them!

Today we had swim, went to the nursery to get our plants, visited a local produce store and cleaned the house and did laundry. Tonight I attempted to get all the plants planted, but it got dark awfully early! I have a few more to go. There is a man in our ward who is determined to get me a garden going. He taught me to roto-till and get the soil ready. Nothing that I planted grew so I kinda let it all go to weed. He came over to check on it and was surprised to see it all weedy. I sprayed and he came once again with his tiller. Tonight when I went back to plant, he had already raked and dug trenches for me! He is a sweet man and I would not have planted anything without him! I am grateful.

Well, it is really late and I have to get to bed. I needed to update though. I still need to catch-up on my birthday, my family reunion, father's day and so much more! One day I might get caught up!

Tevan turns 5!

Tevan. Oh Tevan. Anyone who knows Tevan knows that he can be quite a handful, but is so fun and lovable at the same time! I cannot believe he turned 5!

We went to swimming lessons this morning and when Troy got home from school, he opened his Wii learning adventure game. I decorated his door and when he woke up, he was greated with streamers and a sign. I love this little man...

I decorated his cake and about 1:00 we went to McDonald's for a kids meal. Troy didn't feel very well, but I pushed the Pepto and we headed to the CIRCUS! I didn't quite know what to expect, but we had a blast! We rode an elephant, saw tiger tricks, saw 4 men riding bikes in an iron sphere, watched jugglers throw fire and swords into the air, saw some quick-change magic and much, much more. The kids got their faces painted...Daeson was a pirate and Tevan was death. The kids loved it and I was so happy it was a "good" circus.

After the circus we met my mom, dad, Jesse, and Jaden at Sizzler for dinner and cake. His cake was 8 inch round strawberry flavored and buttercream icing with Super Mario Bro colorflow characters. Tevan had a great time. He kept singing, "Happy birthday to me, happy birthday to me!"

Upon arrival at home, we showered and got the circus off of us and we went on a walk around the block. Then came home to veg on the couch until the kids fell asleep.

Last week I took Tevan in for his well-child check. He didn't get shots, but a good look-over. He is 35 lbs (12%) and 40 inches (7%). He is so small and everyone thinks he is only 3. However, he is growing and on his own curve. He doesn't like to eat meat very much and when he eats anything he would rather be playing.

His favorite food is cheeseburgers (???, I was shocked at that answer!)

His favorite friend is Celest.

His favorite color is black.

His favorite thing to do is play video games.

His favorite treat is s'mores, buthe loves any treats!

He dislikes onions, ketchup or anything else that looks flavorful!

1. Tevan loves me. He gives me kisses and hugs all.the.time.

2. Tevan likes to play with his big brother and rarely likes to play with his baby Sister. She is too hard to keep track of!

3. Tevan is in a size 4, barely.

4. Tevan sleeps well and only wakes up when he has to pee or has a bloody nose.

5. Tevan has the cutest voice and says things very different from what you would expect they would sound like.

6. Tevan doesn't like to listen.

7. Tevan is OBSESSED with video games and loves to play them.

8. Tevan does not like to try new foods at all. There are times he is asked to take one bite and he sits in the chair and cries for literally hours and will not try it.

9. Tevan has a crush on Alexis, the 10 year old neighbor!

10. Tevan likes Pokemon, Bakugon, Beyblades, sword fighting, and bug catching.

11. Tevan is very determined and strong willed.

12. Tevan like to dish it out, but does not like it when others do it to him and he often cries very loudly!

13. Tevan is always singing about something. He likes to make up songs.

14. Tevan hates band-aids.

15. Tevan likes to read and tries to sound things out.

16. Tevan does not like to color.

17. Tevan can write his name.

18. Tevan likes to pick everything: movies, games, foods...

19. Tevan likes to use his imagination. He comes up with some pretty crazy things!

20. Tevan is affectionate. He either likes you and shows his love, or he shuns you. lol

21. Tevan loves to sleep in my bed and I often find him on the very edge in the morning. He loves the nights Troy works all night because then he sleeps with me all night.

I do love this little man. He is so funny at times and I laugh daily with the things he comes up with. He is a trial for sure, but a cute one. He is very handsome and has a super cute smile. I am blessed to have him in our family. What a kid!

Kaebryn Joy turns a year!

Today Kaebryn turns one! I cannot believe how quickly the year has gone. I love this baby with all my heart and she brings such happiness to our family. She is so sweet and loving, and growing so quickly.

Kaebryn:

1. Loves puppies. Any animal really, but puppies are her fave.

2. Loves her ba-ba...or bottle. She is drinking whole milk and made the switch very well. Troy had been giving her sips of milk here and there, and I think it helped.

3. Her brothers. She loves them so much and says, "Daes". She loves going into their room and playing with all their stuff! It's quite funny to see her light-up when she knows she isn't supposed to be doing something.

4. Her vocabulary includes...bear, puppy, mom, dad, Daes, ba-ba, book, num-num, bye-bye, more, and Mama for Grandma.

5. She will let me know she is hungry by smacking her lips together.

6. She gives kisses to others, but bites me. She bites so hard in the last three days, I have had 4 skin-breakings! Those baby teeth hurt!

7. She has six chompers.

8. She is in 18 mo clothes and size 4 shoe.

9. She like to pick out her clothes she wants to wear. I take her to her closet, and she grabs the one she wants.

10. She loves to eat everything! And I mean everything! Nothing is safe around here...dirt, carpet strings, toilet paper, hair from my head, Pokemon cards, books, toys, sheetrock....the list goes on!

11. She loves to wave and does a Miss America wave.

12. She loves to give high-fives.

13. She loves to eat. She is a good little eater and likes most things.

14. She crawls and cruises furniture and loves to get into things this way. If she can reach it...

15. She pulls my dish towels off the oven everytime they are there. She likes to have it on the floor.

16. She plays peek-a-boo with anything she can find...her clothes, towels, washcloths, and blankets.

17. She loves to bath and play in the water.

18. She loves to swim.

19. She loves her backpack. If she sees us grab it, she gets so excited. She loves outside.

20. She loves to help me mow the lawn...I put her in the pack, and away we go. She loooves this.

21. She likes to be held if only for a second. She climbs in my lap and snuggles in.

22. She loves to be up and busy.

23. She loves her daddy. Her daddy has taught her to drink from a straw most recently.

24. She loves pat-a-cake. If she cries, this is our go-to.

25. She is so fun and lovey. We love this baby.

We are so grateful to have Kb in our lives! We all adore her and think the world of her. I am so glad she is thriving and doing so well. She is a sweet heart and so precious!

*The picture is from the other night, she is still sleeping, but I will get one of her to put on today.

update

Kaebryn has pneumonia and we got an iv in her foot last night for dehydration. She is on a zpack and has to use the nebulizer. We are hoping she gets better soon.

Up all night

I have to make this quick as Kaebryn has a Dr appt in 15 minutes. I haven't slept now for 28 hours. Kaebryn is really sick and hasn't slept either. We are both exhausted beyond measure. The night before last Troy had her in the ER with a fever of 104.5. After a few hours later, a catheter and a urine analysis, they sent her home with a schedule for ibuprofen and acetaminophen and an antibiotic for what we think is an ear infection. Yesterday her fever never reduced lower than 103 except once after a big drink and some advil, and it reduced to 100.6. She started throwing everything up and hasn't been able to keep anything down. My heart aches for her. Her skin is dry and chappy. Her breathing is very shallow. She doesn't even cry, it's more like a sad whimper. I wish I could take the pain away from her. It breaks my heart to see her this way. I am so grateful Richard and Peggy took the boys over night for me. It was so nice to focus on Sissy.

We go to the Dr today and I hope we can do something for her. Maybe it is something that just has to pass, I don't know. I have said many prayers in her behalf but they seem to go unanswered. She is resting now, for the first time since yesterday morning. I was able to get the thrown-up-on sheets in the washer and start her bottles in the sink.

This is the part I hate about parenting. I hate seeing my children suffer. I hate that they are sick and so helpless. I will update as soon as I can.

Congratulations, Kaden!

This is my baby brother-in-law. His name is Kaden. He recently graduated from High School and has a great Senior year! Whew, I'm sure he's glad it's over! He was only 6 when Troy and I got married. I remember playing video games with him and taking him swimming. I haven't always been the greatest sister-in-law, but I sure love this kid! He is so fun and cute. Kaden, I am so proud of you! You are going to go far in life. Congratulations!

Daeson is 7!

I cannot believe I have a 7 year old! He has grown so quickly!! I love Daeson so much! He is such a good helper. He is so tall and handsome and I think he is so friendly!

Daeson...

1. Loves his Sissy. He loves to carry her, love her, hold her, and play with her.

2. He loves Pokemon cards and yesterday declared that he would...never get rid of them even when he is a dad. So cute.

3. He loves riding bikes, scooters, and his pogo stick.

4. He is girl crazy, as we all know.

5. He is a show-off and loves to have attention.

6. He is so smart. He is doing algebra and reading very well. He is a quick learner once he decides he wants to learn it.

7. He is a teaser. He likes to pull jokes on people.

8. Though annoyed at times, he lets his little brother tag-along.

9. He is a good hugger. He loves to be held and often requests it.

10. He loves late-night-chats. He likes to have the one-on-one attention.

11. He likes Beyblades, Pokemon cards, Bakugan (though he is fading out of this), and quarter machines.

12. He likes to spend money the second he gets it. It just burns holes in those pockets!

13. He loves to eat and have several snacks during the day. He is a really good eater and has teh worlds fastest metabolism! He is so skinny!

14. He is a daredevil, often doing tricks.

15. He has lost several teeth now and wiggles them loose. He loves the tooth-fairy.

16. He bares his Testimony in Sacrament meeting and is so brave. He loves to talk about church and has many questions regarding the church.

17. He can be stubborn at times, but he is mostly easy going.

18. He loves to draw and color and is very good at this.

19. He loves to be stylish and to have his hair done. He likes to dress himself and express through clothing. The other day he had on one cowboy boot and one tennis shoe.

20. He is a good helper to me and is relied on a lot.

21. He is no longer wetting the bed! This is a huge milestone for us and we are so proud of him. I am sure in 20 yrs he is going to be glad I blogged about this!

22. He loves to jump on the trampoline and is learning to do a back flip. He can flip forward by himself, but still needs help back flipping.

23. He tries to be a friend to everyone and gets upset when the friendship is ended or when someone says they don't want to be his friend.

24. He wears a size 7/8 and has a size 2.5 or 3 shoe. He is so tall and I will get his stats posted on Monday after his visit.

25. He loves his family. He is a loving and caring boy and we love him so much!

I know at times Daeson gets tired of being the oldest. He gets tired of helping so much, but he is a good boy. We are pretty strict with him and he holds a lot of responsibilities...but he gets to do fun things, too. We love Daeson so much. I would be lost without him!

His favorite food is Hootenany (German pancakes)

His favorite friends are Rachel, Brady, Cam, and, of course, all of them :)!

His favorite color is white and black.

His favorite activity is playing with friends.

His least favorite food is nothing.

*This picture is from the 24th. I don't have more recent ones loaded yet.

His day....

I decorated his door with streamers and signs. He got breakfast in bed with Sunny D, eggs in a basket (toast and egg in the middle), yogurt, and sausage. After breakfast we went out for a bit. His friends came at 11:30. We played ring toss, had a hula-hoop contest, KungFu Panda game where you stick tags on the kicks and they are all different points, Birthday Bingo, and Birthday Birthday Boy (Duck Duck Goose). We then went outside and had a BBQ with cheeto balls, hotdogs, corn on the cob and a sundae bar. He didn't want cake, just icecream and lots of fixins! We then played with friends and jumped on the trampoline. This is when he learned to do back filps. He picked Leo's for dinner. We ate and played there. Grandpa and Grandma Blue joined us. We gave him his pogo stick and he was so happy. He did the token games and won over 500 tickets. It took him a while to decide what to spend them on. He went shopping with Grandma and Grandpa and came home with Pokemon cards. He had a great day and I hope it was fun for him.

It's amazing when one aspect in life is thrown into chaos how it effects the others so much. The cupboards are done...finally. Today was the completion of the installation. My kitchen is looking great, but now we have to finish our part...new lights, trim, and bead board. It will be done soon, I hope.

The rest of my house is chaos. I didn't realize how much the kitchen was used until I didn't have it. It is truly the heart of our home. I love having it semi-back. I started moving things in yesterday, and I have been working in it all day today. I'm tired tonight.

Kaebryn is sick. I don't know what she has or how to treat it. She is miserable and wants to be held. All day. I get nothing done. The hard part is that she thinks she wants held, but wiggles out of my arms to get down, once down, she cries to be back up. I love this baby of mine, but I have not had a good nights rest since Oregon. I'm ready to sleep! I feel so bad for her...she just is so stuffy. I think it is from the construction, but she truly could have picked up a bug anywhere.

Daeson finished First Grade today! He got straight A's and did very well with everything. He is a bright child and he is a good boy. He is thrilled to turn 7 on Monday!

Tevan is glad school is out as well. He gets so bored during the day...especially lately. I just haven't been able to spend a lot of time with him. But he is a trooper and uses his imagination so well.

I started watching my friend's two boys off and on. Tev loves having friends. It will work out just fine. There is always an adjustment period.

Tomorrow is our combined birthday party. I started their cakes, but that is as far as I got. I need to make fondant and somehow shape the boys cake into a Skylander's portal. It should be interesting. I made a small cake for Kaebryn. I made a Tinkerbell cake for my niece, Tora. It won't take too long to do the others, I just need to get the rest of the kitchen put away and take the time to do it.

It is almost 11:30 p.m. I think I am going to swap laundry out and head to bed. I will get up in the morning, finish the kitchen, make fondant, color fondant, and apply the fondant to the cakes. I am praying they turn out cute. It's a little out of my league. However, challenge is good.

Blogging hault

I have been extremely overwhelmed lately and blogging has taken a back burner. We have been without a kitchen for two weeks now, as the remodeling has taken over. Troy and I busted our humps trying to get things ready for last Thursday when the cabinet people told me the cupboards would be in....they never came. Friday morning they were here and installed the lower cabinets...not with drawers or cupboard faces, just cabinets. Then the counter top people came in. Troy and I laid the floor, mostly Troy, and got the appliances in. By Sunday our kitchen was almost useable and by Monday, yesterday, I could use it enough to cook again. I am mad at the cabinet people. I am upset they were not straight forward with us and I am mad they didn't answer our calls last week, they just left us hanging. But alas, it will look wonderful when they are done. Sigh...

Troy has a new calling. He will be released from Elder's Quorum teacher and he is now serving in the Young Men's as a quorum adviser.

Daeson's last week of school is this week. He is excited. Today their class went on a field trip. He was really excited about it!

Kaebryn is crawling all over the place and is into everything! The other day Tevan plugged the toilet by flushing half a roll of toilet paper. Before we knew it, I had gone in and peed. When I tried to flush it, it didn't go down. By the time Troy could get in there, she had gone in, found the full toilet and played in it...and ate the pee toilet paper. I'm shocked she isn't sick from the toilet germs, but I have a feeling she is going to be the kid with the best immune system. She eats everything! Insulation, dirt, bugs, pee water, carpet, paper and anything else she can get her mouth on. She is quick too, and she now knows to swallow before I go fishing in her mouth for it!

Tevan is growing finally. He acts a lot older lately too. He is smart as a whip and the trickiest 4 yr old I know.

The boys are grounded from everything until their room is kept clean for a week. Friends, video games, netfilx and so on. I am glad they are unplugged! They actually have imaginations to use!

Troy is back in school. He had a week break and did very well last semester! He had a super hard workload and I am proud of him and the grades he got! He is taking Anatomy and Physiology this semester...a higher level one. He is in for 6 weeks and then starts right after with 6 more weeks of school...we get to apply for Nursing in September! Woohoo.

I am going crazy and I am feeling very unorganized! But we will get this mess out of the way, get ready for a yard sale and try to keep up with everything going on this summer. I bought a Zoo pass, movie tickets through the school, and we have several parks in our area. We should be able to find something to do everyday. Oh, and with Troy working at the Apple, we have free admission there, too. It should be a great summer.

Today we had extremely high winds. It picked a 3 ft by 8 ft piece of 1/2 inch plywood up and threw it against our van putting a huge gash in the front passenger fender! I was in the living room and heard a huge crash...when I went outside, the wood was on the top of the van and when I pulled it off, I saw the gash. Not happy about that!!

Cupboards are supposed to be here in 20 minutes, but I am definitely not going to hold my breath! They probably won't show. But, I know four people not using them now because of their delay. The cupboards look good now, but we will see when they get done.

What is heaven worth?

Warning, another lengthy blog mostly for journaling purposes.

I feel like a slacker lately.  I feel like I am not doing my part, not only feeling this way, but I know I am not doing it.  Last week we didn't got to our block meetings.  No reason other than my kids were still coughing and I wasn't feeling like fighting Kaebryn in sacrament meeting.  So what did we do, you ask?  We drove to Swan Valley for a square ice-cream cone.  Then we drove to Camp Little Lemhi to check it out.

This weekend we have been a bit lazy, we played late last night with some friends and slept in this morning...I am so glad Kb slept in too!  Today we skipped our regional Stake Conference.  Fighting Kaebryn in regular meetings is hard enough, but I knew I wasn't up for it today for two hours.  So, we dallied in the garden a bit, swept the porch, and cleaned out the outside toybox.  We went through some of the kid's toys too and are opting to give them a better home.  We meandered out to Troy's mom and dad's for a delicious turkey dinner made by Kayla and Peggy.  After dinner, we went for a family bike ride.  The grandkids are getting so big and I cannot believe they ride by themselves!  After the bike ride, we came back home, dropped the bikes off, and headed to Sears.  I know we are supposed to keep the Sabbath Day holy, but we justified it because we need a fridge and tonight only they were an extra 15% off, saving us another 240.  Then on top of that, we asked the missionaries to help us unload it.

Hmm....as I review the activities of today, I do with a heavy heart.  I know I have not been doing what I am asked to do.  I know that Heavenly Father is disappointed in my actions.  In my defense, I did attend a relief society planning meeting last Monday and I went to the Temple Friday with my little brother and my cousin. However,  I didn't feel like I usually do when I attend the temple.  I know that it is because I have not been up to par with what I should be doing.  I know there is much for me to do to make-up for my lack of enthusiasm.  I know I get to try harder.  I know I can make mistakes and repent.  I know that there is still hope.

I was chatting with someone this morning and telling her that we had plans to go to Sears and that we didn't go to church today.  I told her, light heartedly, that I had small chances of ending up in the Celestial Kingdom and justified it by saying that I would probably be uncomfortable there anyway.  I have been reviewing my comments all day and I am kinda saddened by them.  I know we are striving to be there...I know it is where I will want to be.  I don't know what phase I am going through right now.  I don't know why after having such a strong testimony my whole life I am struggling now.  I don't know why after 10 years of Troy being inactive I am falling now.  I don't know what is going on with me...I am changing in so many ways.  I feel like I am a stranger to myself sometimes.  I guess I am maybe becoming more reliant on Troy to lead the ways of our family.  I was strong for 10 years, and it was hard.  I feel like now that I have relied on him, I can breathe for a moment and let him carry the spiritual burdens.  He is definitely the stronger one of us right now.

There is no price on heaven.  There is no challenge we cannot overcome.  There is no guarantee in life that we will make it to the top, but only a promise that we can.  I know these things to be true.  I know that I can return to live with my Heavenly Father, and I also know that I have to be the one to want to.  I have to put forth the effort and live according to his plan.  So for now, I  might slack off for a bit, but I know that I will be able to grow stronger and stronger if I choose to.

I know my thoughts have been very random lately, but I have a lot going on in this head of mine and lately this is the only way I can sort things out.  It's a relief to get it out and to reread the thoughts and feelings.  I believe it to be quite therapeutic...although some may think I need to seek therapy !lol

New blogger set-up

I don't like it.  I don't know how to post things the way I want...and I cannot find the post date so I can post things chronologically.  So, no back posting for now.

Music and my spoken thoughts

As I was rocking Kaebryn in the squeaky chair for her nap, I listened to Pandora radio on the internet.  I rocked to Poison, Guns N Roses, Queen, and Bon Jovi.  Then a Johnny Cash song came on.  These are the lyrics.......

"You can run on for a long time
Run on for a long time
Run on for a long time
Sooner or later God'll cut you down
Sooner or later God'll cut you down

Go tell that long tongue liar
Go and tell that midnight rider
Tell the rambler, the gambler, the back biter
Tell 'em that God's gonna cut 'em down
Tell 'em that God's gonna cut 'em down

Well my goodness gracious let me tell you the news
My head's been wet with the midnight dew
I've been down on bended knee talkin' to the man from Galilee
He spoke to me in the voice so sweet
I thought I heard the shuffle of the angel's feet
He called my name and my heart stood still
When he said, "John go do My will!"

Go tell that long tongue liar
Go and tell that midnight rider
Tell the rambler, the gambler, the back biter
Tell 'em that God's gonna cut 'em down
Tell 'em that God's gonna cut 'em down

You can run on for a long time
Run on for a long time
Run on for a long time
Sooner or later God'll cut you down
Sooner or later God'll cut you down

Well you may throw your rock and hide your hand
Workin' in the dark against your fellow man
But as sure as God made black and white
What's done in the dark will be brought to the light

You can run on for a long time
Run on for a long time
Run on for a long time
Sooner or later God'll cut you down
Sooner or later God'll cut you down

Go tell that long tongue liar
Go and tell that midnight rider
Tell the rambler, the gambler, the back biter
Tell 'em that God's gonna cut you down
Tell 'em that God's gonna cut you down
Tell 'em that God's gonna cut you down"

I have been contemplating the world lately, and contemplating my own life changes.  I have been searching my past lessons and the ones I am currently learning now.  I have tried to be non-judgmental to those around me.  I have tried to teach my children right from wrong.  I have tried real hard to be a good example to those around me, and I have tried not to gossip.  

Ahh, gossip.  The words we say about those we know but often harming the ones we love.  It is hard sometimes to keep a still tongue.  If I have something I am dying to tell Troy, I usually start and then he says something like this, "Is this information going to change the way I feel about the person or is it relevant to me?"  That is a great way to look at what we say about others...is it relevant?  Is it going to hurt those around me?  I get caught up in others lives, and stories...it is hard sometimes not to share what we think the story is with others.

This world is falling apart.  What a mess we live in.  We have done this to ourselves.  Do we not remember 9-11?  Do we not remember the hurricanes and tornadoes ripping apart homes and families?  Why do we think we are unstoppable?  What do we need to do to get this world to hold strong?  The daughters of Zion are falling into temptation and families are suffering.

Troy told me today that Sisters in the Latter-Day Saint religion have the highest numbers of depression, and a very high number of Meth users.  This is a sad and scary statistic.  Members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints are supposed to be happy.  We are supposed to have it together and often we make sacrifices that effect us.  He asked me what I thought about the statistic.  This was my reply in a nutshell:

"As LDS members, we have callings that are often very time consuming and take us away from our homes on a regular basis.  We are expected...not from Church leaders, but those in our congregations...to have everything just so.  We have to raise children in troubled times, we have to have our homes together, we have to be the ones running the show, all the time.  Our husbands are usually working or going to school, for life it seems, and are often not around.  We have a higher number of children than those not in our religion and that makes a difference.  We often have our children close together, making it hard to manage things.  We are taught to cook, at home, balanced, nutritious meals.  We are expected by the world to have bodies that fit in the world.  If I were a pop-star, I would be  in all the tabloids with pictures declaring I have not lost all of the baby weight.  It is stressful trying to keep everything together all the time.  And why do we have to keep it together so much?  Because we do gossip and we do judge.  We harm those Sisters by doing so.  We are constantly judging.  Not only those around us, but we judge ourselves, too."  

This is not what our gospel teaches!  Our gospel is one of Jesus Christ.  It is His church.  Then why?  Why are we so quick to judge?  Why do we put so much pressure on ourselves to be perfect and make those around us suffer from our insecurities and our wrong-doings.  Why are we so quick to judge, but are offended and hurt when it happens to us?  

I like the words to this song.  I love the message it holds.  I believe God is trying everyday to get us to pull together.  Bad things are happening all over the earth and it is falling apart.  God is trying to "cut us down" and call us to repent and be true members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints.  He wants us to be happy, and we can.  But it starts with us.  It starts with holding our tongues the next time we have something juicy to say, or the next time someone comes to church in a dress that isn't what we think is up-to-par, we need to not judge.  People all around us are suffering from things we don't know about.  Sadness fills hearts of those struggling and not everyone is open to share what may be happening in their lives.  

I am so glad this song came on today.  I am so glad that the thoughts and feelings I had are to make me a better person.  I am grateful for this gospel of happiness.  I am thankful, though overwhelmed sometimes, for the callings in my life.  Although I complain a lot about Troy being in school all time, I am grateful he is bettering our family life.  The nights my children are sick or the days they drive me crazy, I thank Heavenly Father for the hugs and kisses I get throughout the day.  We are supposed to be a happy people.  We have much to be grateful for.  We need to pull together and make this a better place for our children and their children to grow old in.

A change of heart

The few days, or couple of weeks that I wanted to sell the house, several things went wrong.  The kitchen sink broke, the master bathroom sprung a leak, the sheet-rock in the garage started falling off, the fridge started to have problems, the kids got sick, and so on.  Troy told me it was because I wanted to sell the house and it wasn't supposed to happen.  One night, about a week ago, I had a chat with Heavenly Father.  I explained the reasons I wanted to sell, the logic, the fears, the necessity. I explained that I was tired of Troy's rigorous schedule and scared it was just going to get worse and that I would be left to take care of a yard and house by myself because he never had time to do anything.  I was slipping into a deep slump, maybe even starting depression.  I was exhausted of arguing with Troy about the sale of the house.  I was stressed out thinking how we were going to move into some thing smaller and try to do without.  I was tired of trying to balance and figure out where the money was going.  I was just a mess.  Plain and simple, a mess.

By the end of my prayer, a very quiet and insistent voice told me to trust Troy.  What!??  I have been the one to make most of the decisions.  I have always been the planner and organizer...the OCD one!  Now I have to surrender and trust someone else to make these decisions??  Preposterous!  However, once I decided to let it go, trust Troy and respect his wishes, things started to work out.  My slump started to become happiness, my kitchen sink ended up being a loose pipe, the toilet leak just needs a new ring and some stabilizers.  The kids were happier, and the very next day, we had two offers on our car!  The car we had been trying to sell for months.  It sold literally over night!  Things started to fall into place and everything has worked out since.  I am excited to stay here.  I am thrilled that I am not taking my kids away from their home.  I am excited the way things are falling together.  I am happy.  I am okay with trusting Troy.  He is, after all, a very wise man.  And, I love him for who he is.  He doesn't have to change.  He is perfect for me.

We may not be able to stay here forever...in fact I am pretty sure we will not be able to.  But for now, I will enjoy this place of comfort, love and rest.  I will accept that I was wrong.  I will take the help of our Heavenly Father.  I will get my house all fixed up, enjoy it for now, and then we can sell it when the time is right.  As far as work goes, I still have no leads on a job.  Tory is working this summer for his brother.  I had an offer to work at a camp, but Troy and I don't think it is right for now.  We will continue to budget and save and live within our means.  We still have our pick-up truck to sell, but other than that, we have unloaded a lot.  I have a lot to be grateful for, and I am grateful for the moments that humble us the most so we can recognize the blessings we do have.

Alive

I feel as though my kids have been unusually sick this year.  Thursday night Tevan was complaining of an earache...I thought it was just the wind from the walk we went on.  He didn't complain much after that.  We spent Friday pretty low-laying and then went to Pocatello for Jaden's birthday dinner at Sizzler.  We mad-dashed home and I went to the new Zac Efron movie, The Lucky One, with Becky, Kara, and Jana.  It was okay, but not a movie I would see more than once.  Later that night Tevan was really sad, and when I looked in his ear with our trusty ottoscope, his eardrum was bulged to the size of a pencil eraser. I was shocked to see it so infected.  Troy ran to Walgreens and picked up his meds, thanks to a late night call to my Dad!.  I was able to get some antibiotics in him and he finally got some sleep.  I am especially worried because this is the ear we had repaired last year and I really don't want the trauma of the surgery to have been in vain.

The same night, after we finally got Tevan settled, Kaebryn woke up screaming.  I could not see her eardrum, she had gunk in her ear, but the only way she would settle down was for me to rock and hum the Lullaby song.  Finally around 3 Saturday morning she fell asleep... she slept til 8.  Tevan woke up shortly after 4 a.m. throwing up.  The rest of the kids were up not too long after that.

Troy went to help a neighbor put up a fence and I went to get our Bountiful Basket, almost spacing it altogether.  Our neighbor, Jaimen, came to mow our lawn and then helped Troy sheetrock the garage ceiling.  I got the storage/laundry room cleaned and we babysat Jax, my nephew.  The kids had a great time playing in the water and dirt.  They played on the swing set and later we had a BBQ with the Hoopes family.  It was so nice to be with good friends eating good food in good weather!  I love that it is April and we have great weather.

I have developed a cold.  I don't like colds.  My nose is raw and my sinus pressure is out of control!  However, we are doing okay.  We are surviving and accomplishing much.  We stayed home from church Sunday to get better, and it was nice to relax.  Peggy, Adam, and Kaden came home from Florida and their luggage was behind them.  So we picked up their luggage and headed for a visit.  The kids always love when Grandma comes home from a trip because she returns baring gifts!  Kaebryn got an Ariel piggy bank and the boys got light-up-bubble-blowing-noise-making-guns.  They all loved them...thank you!

Monday.  Everyone loves Mondays.  I do.  It is a new week, a week to try harder.  Today I didn't try very hard.  We spent the day running errands and accomplishing very little.  We first went to the library to return two-days-past movies.  Then to the nursery to get some gardening stuff.  I picked up red potato starts and strawberries.  I got some potting soil and weed killer.  The kids saw the parrot and "talked" to him.  We then ran home for a second and off the Costa Vida where we enjoyed a salad...we had a coupon BOGO free, and it was only 6 bucks!  We went to the cabinet shop and chatted with the cabinet maker/ kitchen designer and then came home briefly.  We picked up Daeson and the Turpins from school, fueled up the van, ran the Turpins home, went to the flooring store and back home for a bit.  We decided to use our Pizza Hut GC and get dinner...A:Troy had to hurry to get to study group and B: I had been gone all day and didn't get dinner started in time.  After arriving at Pizza Hut and waiting ten minutes to be seated, we began to regret our decision.  It was 45 minutes before our food even came!  Troy was late, the kids were cranky and I was tired of walking the floor with Kaebryn...however, the food was mighty tasty!  Thanks for the GC, Mom and Dad, but I think next time we will to carry out!  LOL  After we got home tonight, the kids bathed and dressed for bed.  They watched a 20 minute show while I planted strawberry starts in my pots and then headed to bed.  I also planted tomato, zucchini, crookneck, peppers, butternut, acorn, and....something else I cannot remember right now.  I will give them a nice start before planting them, but the peas, beets, and radishes I have soaking, will go in the ground this week.  I am so excited to do a garden again.  Last year everything got neglected due to the new arrival, but this year I am hard-core!  I am so excited!  My neighbor, Brother Richie, helped me and taught me how to rotto till the ground and helped get the garden ready.  It was so sweet and nice of him and we are truly grateful.  

Cabinet shop, eh?  Yes.  We went to a cabinet shop.  We are not moving, as Troy talked me out of it...that's another story, but we decided to re-do the kitchen so that when we do sell in a couple years, the house will be nice. Right now my kitchen is falling apart.  Not one drawer works properly and the lazy-susans are completely breaking.  The paint is chipping and we need to do something!  Aside the downstairs bathroom, our house has been (or will be with the kitchen) completely remodeled.  We sold our car, another story, and are using that money...which means I am on a budget.  It is hard to have everything while on a budget!  I had to cut some things, but we will be able to add them later, I hope.

So for now, the kids are in bed.  It is late and I am tired.  I am looking at the pile of things on my desk...I should get it done.  I should get something worth while done today, besides gardening.  It is more fun than work anyway!  I have one batch of laundry left, and I think my desk can wait.  Atleast until tomorrow!

Turmoil

There are some deep feelings inside of me regarding my family situation. I have been lucky enough to be a stay-at-home-mom for the last seven years. I didn't always love it, and there were times I would have chosen work over being with my children. However, being sick while pregnant with Kaebryn and not being able to do anything made me appreciate my situation. I have loved being with my kids. I have grown to love the idea of staying home for the years to come.

I have always been a person of deep conviction. If I decide to do something, I am going to do it. I have always been sure of where my life was going. I always knew I was going to marry in the temple a return missionary and when I met Troy, I knew it was him. I knew when I got accepted into Rick's College (now BYU-I) that is where I was to be. I knew that when I decided to start my family, I would do just that. I knew when each of my children were "supposed" to come. I plan things out...I had Easter done in January! I am a planner by nature. I am a organized, almost to a negative point, person and like things to be just so.

One thing I was not planning on was going back to work. Troy is in school full time and as I have mentioned before, he has a rigorous schedule. We are faced with two options right now. We are faced with selling our home...the only home my children have ever known. The place I have lived longer than anywhere else my entire life. This is my home. This is where I am comfortable. This is where I can create, love, teach, comfort, and be myself. I love my home. The other option is for me to work full time, leaving my children here with a sitter this summer and then full tme daycare this fall. I have never left my children in daycare, and quite honestly, I am terrified. I ran a daycare and I loved the children I watched, but I also know that I could have done a better job and that I wasn't their mom. I don't want Kaebryn to take her first steps while someone else is tending her. I don't want to miss the first time my kids flip on the trampoline. I don't want to be gone when they are cuddled up together, loving each other. I just don't want to miss out on them growing up. This is so important to me.

Troy doesn't want to sell. Troy wants to ride things out a little bit and see where they go, but I am a planner. I cannot "ride things out". I need to know what to do now. I love my neighborhood and we know and are friends with most of the people here. I am just sick over this decision. It is one I don't feel like we should wait too long. I want Troy to get through with school and to do well while he is taking his classes. I don't want to attain a ton of student loans. I know I cannot have it all. I know that is not possible. However, I wish I held the answer in my hands. I wish I knew what to do. I decided last week we were putting our home on the market, but then the master bathroom started leaking. So, now we have to fix that. We need to finish the bathroom downstairs and finish trim in the boy's bedroom. We also need to paint the kitchen and get it looking better. It is the only room that has not been remodeled. So there are things we need to do, but by August I want to be able to put it on the market and see what happens. I guess when things are meant to be, they happen...but we have to put forth the effort to make it possible.

Happy Easter 2012

Easter was great this year! We had a warm, beautiful day and it was declared the best day ever by my boys! Daeson was the first one up...like always when he thinks there are gifts to open! We waited until Tevan woke up to open anything, but Daeson sneaked a peek before. The boys opened their baskets before Kaebryn woke up. The Easter Bunny left them some eggs to find, too. Troy made eggs in a basket for breakfast. Tevan's basket picture didn't turn out, but the other two did.

Daeson got a Beyblade, a jumprope, a yo-yo, a rabbit on a bike, and a ton of candy.
Tevan got a HOP basket with a ball/catch game, squirter, chalk, bunny on a bike, and candy.
Kaebryn got a ball, stuffed duck, and a rabbit on a bike and an M&M egg.
The family got a Skylander 3 pk and Hop.

After breakfast, baskets, and the egg hunt, we got ready for church. We had church from 1-4 pm. Troy taught Elder's Quorum and I ran home after sacrament meeting to roll out rolls. Kaebryn ended up pulling a tv tray on top of her, so I stayed home. We got ready to go to Grover's and rushed out forgetting Kaebryn's bottle, but taking rolls, ham, eggs for the hunt, bunny cakes and our kite.

We're home

Well, our week in Oregon was great! We had a wonderful time. The kids all were sick, but we made it through. I will post pics and details soon!

Daeson's eye dr visit

Sunday Tevan was whipping around a piece of paper and Daeson's eye got a paper cut. We told him to tough it out and that it would feel better soon. This morning at about 10 we got a phone call from Daeson saying his eye hurt and he needed to go to the Dr. So Troy grabbed him and went. He has an abrasion on his eyeball and has special eyedrops. He has to wear really nifty sunglasses, I'm glad he is a little boy and doesn't care what he looks like! They are quite "cool". But he should be better in a few days. We then have to take him in for a more thorough visit since his eye chart test came back 20/40! He's so young to have bad eyes! I think its from all the video games! Haha. Troy will disagree with me on that! But he is healing and he was happy he got out of school!

Day number two, Astoria, Oregon

Our first stop in Astori, OR was the Columbia River Maritime Museum. This was a neat place to visit. There were lots of replicas, fishing and coast guard stories, and things to do and see.



Troy backpacked Kaebryn most of the time. She seemed to like it and Troy didn't seem to mind.



This was inside some kind of Navy vessel. This was one of the boys favorites...and when I say boys, it includes Brandon and Troy!!



Troy's cousin, Brandon, is next to a missile...or atleast that is what I think it is!



The boys loved having their pictures taken! They thought it was pretty neat to be next to something waaaay bigger than they.



Troy and Kaebryn loved the museum. This is a missile launcher, I think.



Daeson thought all the replicas were pretty neat. He enjoyed them a lot.



This is a boat wheel,Daeson pretended he was in a storm at sea.



Brandon and D, not sure what that is next to them.



This is an operating Coast Guard boat. Those in the coast guard risk their lives to save many!



This is a view of Astori from the dock. We went into Columbia for a tour. It was tight quarters, but very neat.



This was in front of a propeller. We were waiting for the Riverfront Trolley.



The cream colored house with dark trim and the covered porch on the top row was the house where the Goonies was filmed.



This is the school where Kindergarten Cop was filmed. Our trolley guide was very knowledgeable. He knew what we wanted to see :)



The boys loved the trolley. We all did. When we arrived at the edge of Astoria, we stood up and flipped our seats so we could see the other direction. It was fun to see the amazed faces when the

trolley turned itself around

.

Oregon or bust...our first family vacation

This is our first real family vacation. Troy and I have been on trips for work and little jaunts here and there, but never a vacation. So we left on Friday, March 23, 2012 and headed to Oregon. We first stopped in Pocatello to get my hair cut and then once more in Massacre Rocks to get Tevan. He was at my parent's house for the last three weeks. We then continued on our way. We made little stops here and there, but drove through the night, arriving in Beaverton, OR at 5 am on Saturday, March 24.

The kids were wide awake and so excited, so I stayed awake with them while Troy slept. Brandon, our cousin, works nights, so he needed some more shut-eye as well. After about an hour or two of trying to keep the kids quiet, I decided to venture out on my own. I used the GPS in my cell phone and drove to Sonic for breakfast and then a park for the kids to play. It was windy and chilly, so Kaebryn fussed after her nap. I was a little annoyed...okay, a lot annoyed, but we managed. I found our way back to Brandon's and Brandon woke up. We then woke Troy up and we got ready to venture out in the Portland area.

We went to Fry's...of course! Troy was in heaven! Then we ventured over to a mall, walked around, went to the Lego store, then to the Cheesecake Factory. It was sooo yummy! Tevan and Daeson fell asleep on the bench long before their food arrived, so we got it to go. We headed back to Bran's, got kids ready for bed, fed the boys, and watched one of Troy's favorites, The Simpson's. Then to bed we went. Kb slept in her carseat next to me on the couch, Troy on the blow-up and the boys in a papasan chair in the living room. The next morning, March 25, we got up, ate waffles...thanks, Bran...and headed to Astoria.

Ecuador needs help

My other-mother, Peggy, and my brother-in-law, Kaden, just returned from Ecuador. They went to help in the orphanages. If you would like more information, the link below should direct you. However, I have no idea how to make the link click-able. So just copy and paste like I do! It is a wonderful opportunity to serve.

Orphanage Support Services Organization (OSSO)
www.orphanagesupport.org/

Where has the time gone!?

I figured it was time for an update, just some things I want to be sure get recorded. Tevan has been gone to my parent's house for a couple of weeks now. We will pick him up Friday. He has had a lot of fun, and the little stinker hardly talks to us now. He watches cartoons, helps Grandma, goes to the movies, plays Grandpa's IPad, does chores with Grandpa, and plays toys. What a life. My mom is a really good cook, so he gets to do all of that AND eat her delicious food. We miss him, but as Daeson puts it, we don't miss his fits. When he is done talking to us, he says, "Talk to you later, Bye!" and then hangs up... regardless if we are done talking to him.

Daeson has spring break coming up and so does Troy. We are traveling to the wonderful Oregon coast. It is whale watching week, and we are so excited for this. I am a little anxious for Kaebryn to be in the car all that time, but we will survive I think. We cannot wait.

I have five cakes this week, two for Relief Society, two for my neighbor's kids, and one for my father in law. I hope they all turn out like I imagine. One is going to be a challenge, but the others should be fun.

Kaebryn is army crawling and getting into everything. If she can see it, it is no longer safe. She bites now...and it is not fun. We are trying to get her to stop, but I don't think she will until her top two teeth finish coming in. That makes four teeth for her. She eats everything. She loves to have attention and she loves to look at herself in the mirror. She is so different from the boys. Not that I enjoy girls over boys, they are just different.

Peggy and Kaden just got back from Ecuador. They went for 10 days to work in the orphanages. They loved it and had a great time. What a neat opportunity! Peggy said they are always looking for volunteers, so if you feel like going to Ecuador, I am sure I can get some information for you! What great acts of service! I am grateful they were so willing to go, and even more grateful they are home safely.

I am free from the chains of physical therapy! Dr. Huntsman gave me the okay to get back to normal last Monday. Wednesday was my final day of PT. I am still doin a home program, but atleast I don't go three times each week. I started running last Wednesday and ran Thursday, Friday and today. I also do the stationary bike. I am enjoying being back to normal for the most part. I have lost six pounds since Friday. I want to keep losing so I can enjoy the swimming pools at the hotels in Oregon. However, eating 1000 calories each day is not fun. I skip the icecream and the other treat type foods, but I did allow myself to have some popcorn last night...at only 30 calories a bag, I figured a cup wouldn't hurt!

We saw The Lorax St. Patricks's Day. Very cute and I give it two thumbs up. We took Kaebryn, my nephew, Jaxon, my brother, Jesse, and Adam and Kayla went and treated Daeson. Thank you so much for a fun afternoon! It was super fun. I made a traditional Irish Lamb stew this day...I do not recommend it. Trying the lamb was fun, and it wasn't too bad, but the stew itself wasn't very good. I now know why I previously didn't own majoram spice. I was sorely disappointed.

Well, I'm off to get ready for the day. I sneaked downstairs for a few minutes. Happy Spring!

She's 9 months!!

I cannot believe Kaebryn is already nine months. She is such a happy girl. I love her so much. The things Kaebryn loves:

Food. Anything that has texture, no baby food and very few bottles.
Sesame Street. She will watch Cookie Monster very i intensely.
Me. She lights up when she sees me.
Army crawling. She gets everywhere she wants.
Mischief. She is into everything!!!
Screeching. She screeches so loudly when she feels like it.
Balls. She has a great aim, too. She and I play catch.
Strings. She loves to whip them around.
Giggling. And it is so cute!
Neck kisses. She has a really fat neck and she loves to have it kissed.
Waving. She waves at everything.
Spitting/raspberries. She is doing this always.
Shoes. She will find a pair and suck on them.
Bright colored objects. Anything shiny or colorful attracts her attention.
Mimicking. She copies everyone.
Love. She is a lovey girl!
Staying up late. Boy, I tell you, some nights it is L-A-T-E!

Today we went to the park. Something you rarely get to do in Idaho in March. I put her in the baby swing and she laughed for a minute, then started to fuss. It was a little chilly, so then we went to the van and let Daeson finish playing. We went to Sizzler for a school fundraiser and she had some yummy food. I think her 9 month birthday was pretty great.

Dislocated knee

I have always been the most graceful person in the world, and probably always will be...but if you know me, this does not sound at all like the truth. The truth is, I am not graceful at all. I have broken my arm, my leg, my thumb, cracked my chin open, had many sprained ankles, cut hands, fingers and feet, and have even had a metal spear rammed at my head leaving a huge gash that needed a visit to the ER. I thought I was in the clear...I hadn't needed stitches since Tevan was a year old.

However, Friday,February 3, 2012 I was texting my brother, Justin, climbing into bed and my knee cap slid right off. I screamed for Troy (twice), he was in the living room watching Netflix and obviously didn't hear the alarm in my voice. It was 11:30pm, only 10:30 pm my parent's time so we called my dad. Luckily my knee cap returned to it's normal position and I didn't have to get it set. My fabulous friend, Kara, is a nurse for an orthopedic doctor and came down to assess the situation. I went into shock, but settled down and came to reason. I decided to not go to the ER. I took four Ibuprofen and got some sleep. If you know me at all, you know that I am anti-medicine for the most part. For me to take 4 IB, I was in a lot of pain! The next morning Troy got me crutches so I could get around. He had a huge computer job to do in Rexburg and had to go. He took the kids to his Mom and Dad's house for the day. Thank you soooo much for watching them, Richard and Peggy!!

Monday, the 6th, after a LOOONG weekend on crutches, I went to the Doctor. He told me that I indeed dislocated it and needed a brace and physical therapy. Within the next couple days I ditched the cruthces and just used the brace. The following Monday, the 13th, I started physical therapy and that is where we are. I have been two full weeks and today is the start of the third week. Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays I go for an hour of therapy. Sheesh, all because I cannot get into bed! I am relived to know my insurance covered the xray and the visit, but the stinking brace is 500 bucks. I cannot believe how much it was. But, I am glad it keeps everything in place. Next time I get a brace, I am going to check around first. I am not sure what the physical therapy is running, I hope it isn't too bad!

I can finally bend it to 60 degrees without it hurting too bad. I wear an ace bandage at night because the brace is so bulky. This morning I am trying to let my leg get some air. It gets so tired of being bandaged up and wrapped tight. I just have to be careful what I do!

Happy 6th Birthday, Mieley!

My niece, Mieley, turned 6! Yay for her! I called her the other day and asked what kind of things she likes. These were her answers: Color: Green. TV show: Pink Panther. Things to do: Hike, swim, draw. What she wanted: Roller skates. Kind of cake: sprinkle.

So, having said all of that, the boys and I decided to surprised her with a Pink Panther sprinkle cake. She was surprised and I think she loved it!! The best part? The Pink Panthers were edible!